One: Regardless how powerful and awe-inspiring you know your character to be it is only as strong as others allow it to be. Suspension of disbelief is the cornerstone of good Role-playing and to shatter that by rules quoting and system bashing is looked down upon.
Two: It's up to your opponent whether you successfully hit them or not.
Yes this sounds like a problem in the making but if you follow the advice in rule One this shouldn't be a problem at least with good role-players. Example: When attacking someone use words like 'Swings AT' 'Tries to punch', 'fires spell towards', Etc… Leave it to them to decide if it hits or not. A good player will take hits, perhaps not as you might like but they'll take them.
To get better results take hits yourself. No one said they had to be damaging. One of the biggest arguments I saw was over D&D's 'Magic Missile' spell. In the game system it always hits. I watched as people argued over this saying anyone using it were an auto-hitting munchkin. Never ONCE did any of the involved parties consider
A) It does a meager amount of damage even at high levels and more importantly
B) in Free form who said you had to TAKE any damage from the Hit? Always hitting doesn't mean always damaging does it? Instead of the Role-playing breaking down into an argue flame-fest all someone had to do was take the hit and say for some reason they weren't harmed by it. Rule Two: Your opponent decides if they're hit by your attack.
Three:Never ignore an attack by a capable player. It's all right to ignore constant auto-hits. The person clearly isn't getting the idea of keep combat. However if you're playing a particularly hated villain type you could very well end up in a several on one situation. Try to react to every attack or at least try to acknowledge them. Most of the times players will realize you're in the situation of having to write up several reactions and will give you time. React to every attack.
These three rules seem basic and perhaps a bit over-simplified however they are the keys to free-form combat. It's a matter of give and take. Everyone is there to have fun and with a bit of consideration and effort even combat can be that way too. Some other things that are worth mentioning are if you have a problem with or just don't understand someone's attack, ask them via PM, or IM to explain the attack in greater detail or tell them why you're having a problem. Don't insult, condescend or otherwise 'diss' the person. You get what you give and if you give out crap that's what you'll get in return. Some simple and calm words serve a lot better then heated anger.
Another suggestion, try to type legibly. Typos and misspellings happen to us all far more often than any of us would care to admit but we TRY to correct them as best as we can. To many this seems to be nit-picky but it all goes back to what I said in the first rule, suspension of disbelief is the key to good role-playing and constant misspellings and plain laziness in typing detract from that greatly.
Along the same lines as my last suggestion is the use of 'net speak' or l33t speak, whatever you want to call it. In Instant messengers and places of limited chat lines it has its place. Simply and bluntly put don't use it. It's annoying and ruins Role-playing. Don't be lazy in your typing. Show some pride in your words.
One aspect about fighting is healing. It is rude in the extreme to just run up and start asking 'what's wrong' or worse just start healing someone. Firstly you have no idea what resistance or twists that character might have and could very well end up hurting them and Secondly some people don't like the 'insta-heals' that fill the genres especially those from video games. Grab a gem and boom you're healed! ASK first, again IN A PM OR IM. Not everyone likes 'magical healing'. Politeness never hurts. The worst they can say is no.
Lastly the final comment about Combat , have fun. These characters aren't actually attached to your central nervous system; they do not transfer their damage to you in any fashion. They're intellectual creations that have no substance. Do not get into a tizzy if your favorite uber-monk gets into a fight that 'might' hurt him. Relax, take a deep breath and just have fun!
